"Bring that guy back here, we'll cat-face the shit out of him"

Just got back from Leeds Festival, was amazing. :D
Dad was at Reading Festival this weekend with TheOtherWoman and her two youngest kids, I have no idea who's idea that was, she hates camping, the kids hate Dad, Dad doesn't know any of the bands...?
ShreddedWheat called Mum 3 times while me and SarcyOlderSister were away at LeedsFest. Once to congratulate me on my GCSE results, (he also called to congratulate SarcyOlderSister on her A levels even though they had always hated eachother) and once to ask her to go to the pub with him (she turned him down, thank God).
Oh and he left her a message to tell her that he missed her, basically.
She's getting sick of it.
I just told her "you're a hell of a woman to get over, kid".
Everything is abit slow right now, not alot going on.
We need some more action from ExFarmers wife if you ask me, she's always good value.
Over.